I have decided to embark on a fascinating journey. This past Wednesday my Healing, Birthing, and Dying class took a little field trip to Main Street Yoga Studio in downtown Bloomington. I have been looking forward to this trip since syllabus day! This trip was also of great importance to me because I am actually working with the founder of the studio for my ethnographic research paper on Ayurveda and yoga.
As we were sitting in this calm room listening to the two ladies speak to us about doshas, chakras, Ayurveda, and yoga, I found myself entranced. Never before have I been this completely absorbed in something. Now this is a big thing for me because yoga just isn't an exercise, like everyone believes. It is a spiritual way of life. Me, spiritual? Say what?!
My point, EXACTLY! For the first time, I feel drawn to something spiritual. Everything that I have learned thus far about yoga and the Ayurvedic way of life has inspired me. So this is my new journey. I'll let you know how it goes.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Rush of Emotions
This entry might not be coherent and may contain a lot of random information and emotions. But that's how I feel about life right now.
1. A couple days ago, I received word that my grade school bus driver, George, had died. Even though I hadn't seen this man in many, many years, the words hit me like a falling anvil. This was the jolly old man that forgot me on my first day of Kindergarten because I was standing on my porch, rather than the side of the street. This is the man who used to buy me Christmas ornaments because I was undoubtedly his favorite! He got me to and from school safely, every day for almost 9 years of my childhood. For months, Facebook messages had been circling around my grade school friends about George's ill health. It was asked of us to send cards, letters, and pictures because he was home-bound with nothing to do. Did I ever do this? Regretfully, no. I just never found the time to sit down and write them. I thought of many things I would tell him: where I went to college, my time in Australia, send a few pictures, etc. Like I said, I hadn't seen him in years and I'm pretty certain the last time I did I was still in high school. But now, I will never get the chance. Don't be like me and regret not saying things to people. Take each day like the last and say what you need to say.
2. WHEN THE HECK DID IT BECOME THE END OF OCTOBER?! Since this is I-Week for all the new Kappa Deltas, I have been having many "OMG! I'M A SENIOR!" days. Honestly, I am ECSTATIC to be a senior and to almost be done with college. (If you don't know this about me, you don't know me very well.) I can't wait to start a job, live by myself with Marco, not have "homework", etc. But seriously, why is it all ending so quickly? Before I know it, us seniors will be celebrating KD Christmas with a trip to the 21 and older establishments before finals week. It seems like only yesterday Amber and I were sitting at last year's commenting on how we would get to be the seniors next year! Time is flying...
3. Stresssssssss. Need I say more? Whoever told you senior year would be easy and fun, well they lied. It's one thing after another and I barely have time for myself anymore. Although, I did spend last Saturday night on the floor of my bedroom, with a bottle of wine, and four good movies. It was superb!
4. I miss my Australian family. I've only been able to see two people, Abbey and Al, since being back. Cait, Courtney, and I have talked about a reunion numerous times but I fear we are all too busy. I just miss those people so much. Oh, and maybe a few that I left in Australia too...
1. A couple days ago, I received word that my grade school bus driver, George, had died. Even though I hadn't seen this man in many, many years, the words hit me like a falling anvil. This was the jolly old man that forgot me on my first day of Kindergarten because I was standing on my porch, rather than the side of the street. This is the man who used to buy me Christmas ornaments because I was undoubtedly his favorite! He got me to and from school safely, every day for almost 9 years of my childhood. For months, Facebook messages had been circling around my grade school friends about George's ill health. It was asked of us to send cards, letters, and pictures because he was home-bound with nothing to do. Did I ever do this? Regretfully, no. I just never found the time to sit down and write them. I thought of many things I would tell him: where I went to college, my time in Australia, send a few pictures, etc. Like I said, I hadn't seen him in years and I'm pretty certain the last time I did I was still in high school. But now, I will never get the chance. Don't be like me and regret not saying things to people. Take each day like the last and say what you need to say.
2. WHEN THE HECK DID IT BECOME THE END OF OCTOBER?! Since this is I-Week for all the new Kappa Deltas, I have been having many "OMG! I'M A SENIOR!" days. Honestly, I am ECSTATIC to be a senior and to almost be done with college. (If you don't know this about me, you don't know me very well.) I can't wait to start a job, live by myself with Marco, not have "homework", etc. But seriously, why is it all ending so quickly? Before I know it, us seniors will be celebrating KD Christmas with a trip to the 21 and older establishments before finals week. It seems like only yesterday Amber and I were sitting at last year's commenting on how we would get to be the seniors next year! Time is flying...
3. Stresssssssss. Need I say more? Whoever told you senior year would be easy and fun, well they lied. It's one thing after another and I barely have time for myself anymore. Although, I did spend last Saturday night on the floor of my bedroom, with a bottle of wine, and four good movies. It was superb!
4. I miss my Australian family. I've only been able to see two people, Abbey and Al, since being back. Cait, Courtney, and I have talked about a reunion numerous times but I fear we are all too busy. I just miss those people so much. Oh, and maybe a few that I left in Australia too...
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Isn't it Ironic?
I have been meaning to start a blog again ever since I got back from Sydney. Unfortunately, I don't feel like my life is that exciting back in the ole Midwest. We'll see what comes out of this. Credit to Amber for giving me the inspiration to get back out there in the world.
This entry was technically for October 20, but seeing as I haven't had any time until today to write it, I'm doing it now.
For those who do not know, October 20 was the four month anniversary of my daddy's death. Here are some coincidences from that day that made me want to write about it:
1. I realized that morning that I had not been to Sissy's site in awhile. I decided to check up on it and read the entries that I hadn't seen. The entry that I read was a month old, but at the end, it referenced that September 20 had been the three month anniversary. I stopped to think, realized that it was exactly a month later, and got a little freaked out. Honestly, if it wasn't for reading that blog entry, I would not have realized that it was the anniversary. In September, I realized the day after. I hope this doesn't make me a bad daughter, but I just tend to block out the 20th of every month now.
2. In my Healing, Birthing and Dying class, my professor chose this day to talk about how animals can sense death and freak out. Um, Marco anyone?! Once again, I was brought back to that memory of Father's Day, which I have also tried to block out from my memory. Watching someone die isn't really something you want to remember, even if it was your own father.
3. Last but not least, I was at work minding my own business. One of the little three/four year olds came up to me and for no reason at all asked, "Where's your daddy?" I was shocked that I just stared at her until she repeated the question. My answer, "He's not here?" That got me thinking about death and how you explain that to young children. She had no idea what I meant by it, and why would she. Was that really an appropriate response though? Sometimes I think yes because well, he's really not here. But other times I think no because I know he's around me and watching at all times. Such a fine line to walk, especially with little children.
To some, the 20th of every month is just another day. Not for me. Not anymore.
This entry was technically for October 20, but seeing as I haven't had any time until today to write it, I'm doing it now.
For those who do not know, October 20 was the four month anniversary of my daddy's death. Here are some coincidences from that day that made me want to write about it:
1. I realized that morning that I had not been to Sissy's site in awhile. I decided to check up on it and read the entries that I hadn't seen. The entry that I read was a month old, but at the end, it referenced that September 20 had been the three month anniversary. I stopped to think, realized that it was exactly a month later, and got a little freaked out. Honestly, if it wasn't for reading that blog entry, I would not have realized that it was the anniversary. In September, I realized the day after. I hope this doesn't make me a bad daughter, but I just tend to block out the 20th of every month now.
2. In my Healing, Birthing and Dying class, my professor chose this day to talk about how animals can sense death and freak out. Um, Marco anyone?! Once again, I was brought back to that memory of Father's Day, which I have also tried to block out from my memory. Watching someone die isn't really something you want to remember, even if it was your own father.
3. Last but not least, I was at work minding my own business. One of the little three/four year olds came up to me and for no reason at all asked, "Where's your daddy?" I was shocked that I just stared at her until she repeated the question. My answer, "He's not here?" That got me thinking about death and how you explain that to young children. She had no idea what I meant by it, and why would she. Was that really an appropriate response though? Sometimes I think yes because well, he's really not here. But other times I think no because I know he's around me and watching at all times. Such a fine line to walk, especially with little children.
To some, the 20th of every month is just another day. Not for me. Not anymore.
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